Pebble in a Pool

I am not a TV person at all but sometimes I sit down with Harry for an hour of chilling in front of the idiot box before we go to bed. Last evening, and I cannot even remember what programme it was but I suspect it might even have been a trailer for something, someone said ‘I wish I had never been born’. The outcome was that his wish was granted and as he walked through his world looking for familiar things and places he had built, empires of industry and people he had known, they were missing. As I said I am not a TV person at all but it made me think. ‘What if I had never been born’ ‘What impact have I had on the world?’
It made me think hard. I have eight children, fourteen grandchildren, soon to be fifteen and I suppose, if I hadn’t been born, the impact on everyone connected with these people would be different. I haven’t achieved anything great that would be reported in the news, I have achieved personal goals but would they impact on anyone else? Perhaps my children might have done things differently in their lives if I had not personal goals to aspire to. I think the one thing that I have achieved is that each of my children is a thoughtful and understanding person. They don’t fight with each other and they accept the difference between each other. Of course they have opinions and often have a little criticism of one another but none of them have ever fallen out. We have a great extended family with step children, half brothers and sisters and adopted children yet not one of my immediately family would ever call any of their siblings anything but brother and sister. If one needs a helping hand, there is always someone there to help them and most of all they are good people.
Does that constitute a something I have left in this world? It isn’t a building. It isn’t an empire. There are no credits for any amazing acts of sacrifice, generosity, kindness, yet, somewhere in the wake of my path through life there must have been changes, a difference to someone, an insight into something another person might want to achieve. I will never know I am sure but I like to look at my children and to see what they have achieved. You see I also take some credit, call it arrogance or whatever, but something I gave to each of my children gave them the strength to choose their paths in life and understand consequences. To make their own decisions knowing someone will support their decisions, right or wrong. They are musical, artistic, dramatists, they are good with other people, are understanding and supportive, some are strong against all adversity, some are sensitive to the simple things that a lot of folk never see, they love nature, appreciate the world around them, people or friends and care about someone they have never met but share a common interest. They are supportive to others, giving, caring and loving…. Roots and wings. I cried when they had left but smiled when I knew that I had supported them as people strong enough to be true to themselves, and to go out into the world with a strong sense of who they really are. I’ve made many mistakes but then I think, those mistakes have taught us all something.
So what have I left because I was here? What difference have I made in the world? I think I have made a big difference, I have children out there in Florida, Switzerland, Spain and the UK who are making their way in the world and I am sure they are making the same difference to those around them. They know how to listen, they are strong enough to survive against all adversity, they share their music with others and celebrate the joy of life with everyone, they believe in themselves but most of all, each and every one of them know who they are, where they belong and how to share a smile with a stranger…. Just in case they might be an angel in disguise. My impact on the world is just that…. and it could be the one thing that changes the world … a smile or a kindness to a stranger…. Well maybe, but each act of kindness that is spread because of me is like a pebble in a pool, may the ripples spread that thought in life’s never ending circle!